He did it because there was something wrong with him. They do love their wives but still, they can be experiencing some psychological problems. One woman shared her story about dating a married guy. He was a gentleman and a nice family guy. And the main thing was that he was not going to leave his wife. Another guy was able to answer this question. He had been happily married for more than 20 years and had kids.
And yes, he loved his wife a lot, but he had been cheating for more than 15 years. At the same time, he also feels guilty about it.
He has lived with his wife already for 10 years and been a perfect husband and father, but suddenly he meets his soulmate. This new feeling can be very powerful and consume you from head to toe. They still have a huge connection with their wife. A lawyer who has dealt with many divorces shared her experience, saying that it is very painful to separate, but it is especially painful to stop being a full-time parent.
But guess what? Men who cheat on their wives always seem to thrive on juggling their lives and sharing their time between their family and their secret affair. It is like biting huge chunks out of your cake every time and still having it right there in full.
Men recognize the high standing they have in the society as married people and they usually do not want to lose out on that. So to leave their wife for no reason, just to be with the side chick, mistress or sugar girl will be the very last thing on their minds.
And by refusing to hold them to the expected standard of faithfulness, wives allow these men roam, waiting at home with open arms for whenever they return home. Society has been so structured in a way that makes women believe and accept that having a man who cheats is better than being single at some certain age, or worse, being single with kids or being divorced. Now the idea that someone would love his wife and cheat on her may sound seriously conflicted but it does seem to happen.
People who claim to love their wives have been known to have side chicks despite a staunch, unshakable decision to never let go of the wife no matter how good the mistress gets. Many times for this kind of man, the side chick is just all fun and games and he must have already compartmentalized his mind to keep it that way forever.
If you have been giving him sex without commitment all along, allowing him the benefit of your luscious body before he returns to his family at night, why would he suddenly want to change that? No one changes a working formula. A cheating man would always want to continue enjoying the best of both worlds. Why disrupt that? We would love to hear what you think about the content on Pulse. At the same time, she says, she did not let him off the hook for making damaging choices.
Filling that need did not come naturally to her — a situation Perel, the psychotherapist, describes as very common. That empathy is critical in forgiveness — a key component of affair recovery, according to experts and partners who have gotten through it. While divorce would have been hard, it was much harder for her to look at herself and the layers and dynamics of her marriage, she says.
Over the course of a year, Walker interviewed 46 women who had all set up accounts on Ashley Madison — a website specifically intended for facilitating affairs — with the sole purpose of finding a cheating partner who met their sexual needs.
While it should be said that most affairs are only tangentially related to unsatisfying sex , Walker says many of the women in her study believed their affairs would save their sexless or sexually unsatisfying marriages.
The vast majority said that, aside from not getting their sexual needs met, they felt they had pretty good lives with good men. Weiner-Davis says that difference is not borne out in her practice, however. Such was the case with Lawrence, the woman who chose to cheat on her husband after enduring his numerous affairs.
Eventually, Lawrence started checking his phone and found what she thought was proof of multiple affairs. Her husband, she says, trivialized the messages. While there is little data on whether men or women are more likely to opt for dissolution when they are the cheating partner, Munsch theorizes that, because women tend to have more emotional affairs while men tend to stray strictly for sex, women are more likely to want a divorce.
Lawrence chose to have an affair with a man who she felt loved her for who she was. After the relationship was exposed to her husband, the affair ended badly, she says.
Although the couple stayed together for a few more months, Lawrence got an attorney when she learned that her husband was having another affair. After six years of marriage and within a year of her infidelity, Lawrence filed for divorce. One thing is true: Many women find themselves experiencing infidelity, whether they are the betrayed or the betrayer. But social stigma keeps a lot of them from talking about it.
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